I wish I’d known

[RIP]

OJai: is godspeeding J.D. Salinger, mostly as a show of solidarity with unpleasant weirdos everywhere.

elljaypea: Summed up perfectly. My first thought is, “Oh! J.D. Salinger died.” My second thought is, “Huh. I don’t really…care.” But I don’t think YOU’RE an unpleasant weirdo.

OJai: I appreciate that.

elljaypea: Also…in regards to your celebrity look-alike photo, have you considered, oh. dang it. The Belgian tennis player? There are some mouth similiarties. Amy’s hair + tennis woman’s mouth = OJai. …Maybe.

OJai: Who, Kim Clijsters?

elljaypea: aHA! No, Justine Henin.

cimblog(tm): I think you’re a weirdo….hardly unpleasant, though.

elljaypea: http://tennisinfoblog.com/who-will-be-the-one/serena-williams-justine-henin-australian-open/

elljaypea: Nice distinction, cimblog(tm)!

OJai: You don’t think I look more like Serena Williams?

cimblog(tm): Why is Amy Grant you’re profile photo? You don’t look like her…do you?

OJai: Oh yeah, I know this face:
http://www.topnews.in/sports/files/r148751_526934.jpg

elljaypea: Maybe if you got a REALLY GOOD tan. MAYBE.

cimblog(tm): that face has been directed at me a time or two….

elljaypea: THAT’S totally the face!

elljaypea: See? that face + Amy’s hair = … Not Serena Williams.

cimblog(tm): The Wiliams sisters are both weirdos AND unpleasant!
[way to bring it around cimblog(tm)]

OJai: Amy Grant is the only famous person I had ever been told I resembled. I’ve also been told I resemble one of my grandfathers, but he’s not famous.

elljaypea: Meanwhile, i can’t really play along with the whole “which celebrity you look like” thing because I don’t look like a celebrity. I look like your cousin. Probably your pregnant cousin. Anyone’s pregnant cousin. Well, except Bob. Not him. Although I’ve been told I look like Doris Day…I don’t really see it.
http://www.catalogs.com/coolpicks/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/doris-day.jpg

OJai: cimblog(tm), the meme of the week is “post your celebrity lookalike photo.”

cimblog(tm): Whose theme? Says who?
[wonder who i look like]
elljaypea, you have Doris’s nose…

cimblog(tm): (give it back)

OJai: Meme. I don’t know whose; it’s going around fb. You know me, I’m a joiner. (And I’m a dead ringer for Serena Williams.)

OJai: elljaypea! you should TOTALLY wear your hair like that!

elljaypea: You know…THEY.

elljaypea: Only if you give me a rose to sniff.

cimblog(tm): [runs out, knocking chair over, to get elljaypea a rose]

elljaypea: So…gonna change that profile pic, OJai?

OJai: Yeah…

elljaypea: BWAahhahhhaahahahahahaha! Oh, the imagery of cimblog(tm) running to give me a rose so I can have Doris’s ‘do. Oh, the tears of laughter!

cimblog(tm): When i was a kid i got told i looked like gidget….i think that’s because people liked to say “gidget”….only, my mom called me “idjit”

OJai: Sorry about the threadjack, Salinger. Stuff like this is probably why you went into hiding.

cimblog(tm): ROFLMAO !!!!

cimblog(tm): ….who do I look like?
http://images2.wikia.nocookie.net/muppet/images/d/de/Character.judy.jpg

elljaypea: OJai, I think the arms are really where you and Serena look alike. Definitely.

elljaypea: Good one, cimblog(tm)!

OJai: cimblog(tm)! POST IT!

OJai: http://media.nj.com/realtimesports_impact/photo/kim-clijsters-australian-open-edc34f51a935f12e_large.jpg

cimblog(tm): I can see it….

OJai: I know this look too. Crazy eyes.
http://www.world-track.org/sportsnews/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/Kim-Clijsters-300×178.jpg

cimblog(tm): Bwaaaaahahahaah….TOTALLY more you…Crazy eyed OJai!

OJai: cimblog(tm):
http://www.pixelhuset.se/downloads/screen/dtp_mission_1600.jpg

Linny: OH MY GOSH!!! Tears….tears I tell you! and a spit take when I opened cimblog(tm)’s photo of Judy! I was laughing and wheezing so hard like Mumbley http://www.mumbly.net/mumbly.gif that people came over to check on me!

Linny: also…I have been told I look like Nellie Olson…that is not funny….http://www.todayfm.com/Images/UKF-Nellie.jpg

cimblog(tm): oooo
http://ia.media-imdb.com/images/M/MV5BMTkzODg4NjI0N15BMl5BanBnXkFtZTYwNzUxNDI2._V1._SX306_SY400_.jpg

cimblog(tm): Oh, Linny…it’s funny alright…again: “I think you’re a weirdo….hardly unpleasant, though.”

OJai: Linny, if I triple-dog-dare you, will you do your hair like Nellie’s?

cimblog(tm): and if I second that, does it become a quintuple dog dare?

Linny: the last time my hair dresser did my hair, it kind of DID look like Nellie’s….and as I was curling it in big ringlets…I said This has to stop!!

cimblog(tm): (JD Salinger, we have given you some GOOOOOOD material here…RIP)

Linny: cimblog(tm)….don’t say you don’t look like someone famous…
http://goodwillnynj.files.wordpress.com/2009/10/velma.jpg

Linny: elljaypea, you do have a little of the Doris Day in you…I agree with cimblog(tm)–I think it is the nose…also you have that toothy smile going for you…

cimblog(tm): VELMA!!! I totally look like VELMA…

OJai: Velma rocks.

cimblog(tm): I’m kinda smart and nerdy like her, too… Totally not the pretty one. LOL

* You cannot bring about prosperity by discouraging thrift
* You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong
* You cannot help the poor man by destroying the rich
* You cannot further the brotherhood of man by inciting class hatred
* You cannot build character and courage by taking away man’s initiative and independence
* You cannot help small men by tearing down big men
* You cannot lift the wage earner by pulling down the wage payer
* You cannot keep out of trouble by spending more than your income
* You cannot establish security on borrowed money
* You cannot help men permanently by doing for them what they will not do for themselves

– William J. H. Boetcker
(These words are often falsly attributed to Abraham Lincoln)

Enjoy:

cimblog(tm): Check out this cool picture I took
Boss: You know, that’s a wild animal, it will EAT YOUR FACE

So, while working I thought it would be easy to chat with Charter about my services online.  That way I could still answer my boss’s phone and work on my project.  Seems easy, right???

I connected with someone and specifically said that I wanted to downgrade my phone service because I barely use it and my bill is too high.  RIGHT AT THE BEGINNING…  After about 10 minutes giving my information to the person and convincing the person I just made a payment they say say to me,

“you have the wrong department, I’ll transfer you.”
“why didn’t you tell me that in the beginning when I asked you about it????  i was clear with my question up front.”
“I’m sorry let me transfer you.”

I go through the WHOLE thing again…and the again state at the BEGINNING I want to downgrade my phone service.  This time, it’s about 15 minutes because she kept telling me I needed to pay my bill, to which I kept saying, “yes, I just paid online.”  I finally lost it…

cimblog(tm): i know that
cimblog(tm): i know i know i know
cimblog(tm): i paid $ about an hour ago
cimblog(tm): the other rep said it didn’t go through
cimblog(tm): before i make another one i’m checking with my bank
cimblog(tm): pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease can we discuss my PHONE SERVICE
TTD Guia Marie : We have phone promotion for $29.99.
cimblog(tm): I’d prefer to have something that isn’t a promotion that goes up at the end of a certain amount of time. I rarely use my phone…
TTD Guia Marie : I see.
TTD Guia Marie : I regret to inform you, but online Chat Support does not cater to downgrade request at this time. Please call us at 1-888-438-2427 to be assisted.
cimblog(tm): you couldn’t have said that at the beginning of our chat?
cimblog(tm): when I specifically asked about downgrading my service?
TTD Guia Marie : I’m sorry.
TTD Guia Marie : I wanted to offer you a promotion.
cimblog(tm): this is the worst customer service i have received in a very long time
cimblog(tm): i was very specific with my request
cimblog(tm): yet you have kept me here with me thinking you could help me

Then I called the number.  Gave all my information to another lady.  She said….”I have to transfer you…”  I said, “Am I going to have to give all this information again, because I’ve about had it…”  She said, “Yes, probably, I’m sorry.”

I got Andy.  I said, “Andy, I’ve been at this 45 minutes now and frankly I’m at the end of my rope and am about to cancel all my services…”

God Bless Andy…he was very nice and calmed me down and then saved me $31 on my existing service for 12 months…Which I suppose is better than a poke in the head with a sharp rock…but only just barely.